Okay so here it is, the beginning of the long awaited blog from yours truly...as you all may recall I attempted blogging on myspace but with the advent of facebook I have found that I am spending less and less time on myspace. Ergo, my official blog, Under the Big Red Top, The Life and Sexual Times of a Gay Red Head!
As I look back on my life and relive some of my more indiscreet moments I find that I have done some pretty funny shit. So here is my gift to you! The life and sexual times of a gay red head, born and raised as a Southern Baptist in conservative Colorado. I am no longer a practicing bigot but have found some form of spirituality that keeps me centered. Although I love Colorado, the Rocky Mountains, the prairies, the wilderness, the men...the mountain men...damn I miss Colorado. Wait...I take that back, no I don't I just miss all those beefy, masculine, rugged Brawney men of colorful Colorado. Seriously, they look like those men on the Brawney paper towel packaging!
As I have traveled through life and found myself in different cities at different periods of my life, I definitely have some stories to tell. When I share said stories with my friends they usually say..."only you." Which is true, I have found myself in some pretty fucked up situations, but I just have to laugh it off otherwise I'd stress myself out. So fuck the stress, I'll just blog it all and then you can point and laugh at my life like I have. I mean I can't stress out, I'd fuck with those great genes of aging gracefully I inherited from my mother. Thanks mom! I heart you, and I hope you don't stumble upon this one day before I have a chance to tell you. Oh well, at least the rest of my family is more fucked up than I. I am just the gay one! Seriously, here's a story I am sure you will enjoy.
Last Christmas I went home to Colorado for the holidays to visit my mom. Well, each time I return home, I find out some new shit about my fucked up family that has always been there but I never knew because they try to keep it a secret. Well guess what it's not a secret anymore. So my mom tells me that my cousin Lacey is all upset over her daughter Katrina which would be my second cousin. Here's a little back story...Lacey used to be a coke head (again I say...and I am just the gay one) until she met her husband who at the time was her prison pen pal. No joke, I couldn't make this shit up, it's all real except for the names. Yes it was her prison pen pal Dan who got her on the right track. She married him while he was in prison then when he got out they moved in together and cleaned up pretty well. Anyhow, I guess she's getting a good dose of what she put her mom through because now her daughter is on something herself probably Tina but my mom doesn't know the street names for drugs, she just says Katrina's on methamphetamine's. So Lacey's all distraught because her daughter is all fucked up on some shit. She said that my cousin Lacey is taking care of her daughter's baby. I had no idea she had a kid, I mean the last time I remember Katrina is watching her projectile vomit when she was an infant all over my mom one year at Thanksgiving. It was hilarious just like in that new movie Four Christmases! Anyhow so yes back to her baby. I was stupid enough to ask my mom who the father of the child was. This is the kicker...the father of the child is none other then Katrina's step brother, yeah that's right, Dan's son, the husband of Lacey. Yeah ain't that some Greg and Marsha Brady bullshit! I know they aren't blood related but damn! I mean if my step brother was hot I have no doubt I would fuck him, but at least we wouldn't have to worry about creating a fetus from our love tryst! So to my family that doesn't know I am gay, let's rethink things before you start judging me and my "lifestyle choice."
As I look back on my life and relive some of my more indiscreet moments I find that I have done some pretty funny shit. So here is my gift to you! The life and sexual times of a gay red head, born and raised as a Southern Baptist in conservative Colorado. I am no longer a practicing bigot but have found some form of spirituality that keeps me centered. Although I love Colorado, the Rocky Mountains, the prairies, the wilderness, the men...the mountain men...damn I miss Colorado. Wait...I take that back, no I don't I just miss all those beefy, masculine, rugged Brawney men of colorful Colorado. Seriously, they look like those men on the Brawney paper towel packaging!
As I have traveled through life and found myself in different cities at different periods of my life, I definitely have some stories to tell. When I share said stories with my friends they usually say..."only you." Which is true, I have found myself in some pretty fucked up situations, but I just have to laugh it off otherwise I'd stress myself out. So fuck the stress, I'll just blog it all and then you can point and laugh at my life like I have. I mean I can't stress out, I'd fuck with those great genes of aging gracefully I inherited from my mother. Thanks mom! I heart you, and I hope you don't stumble upon this one day before I have a chance to tell you. Oh well, at least the rest of my family is more fucked up than I. I am just the gay one! Seriously, here's a story I am sure you will enjoy.
Last Christmas I went home to Colorado for the holidays to visit my mom. Well, each time I return home, I find out some new shit about my fucked up family that has always been there but I never knew because they try to keep it a secret. Well guess what it's not a secret anymore. So my mom tells me that my cousin Lacey is all upset over her daughter Katrina which would be my second cousin. Here's a little back story...Lacey used to be a coke head (again I say...and I am just the gay one) until she met her husband who at the time was her prison pen pal. No joke, I couldn't make this shit up, it's all real except for the names. Yes it was her prison pen pal Dan who got her on the right track. She married him while he was in prison then when he got out they moved in together and cleaned up pretty well. Anyhow, I guess she's getting a good dose of what she put her mom through because now her daughter is on something herself probably Tina but my mom doesn't know the street names for drugs, she just says Katrina's on methamphetamine's. So Lacey's all distraught because her daughter is all fucked up on some shit. She said that my cousin Lacey is taking care of her daughter's baby. I had no idea she had a kid, I mean the last time I remember Katrina is watching her projectile vomit when she was an infant all over my mom one year at Thanksgiving. It was hilarious just like in that new movie Four Christmases! Anyhow so yes back to her baby. I was stupid enough to ask my mom who the father of the child was. This is the kicker...the father of the child is none other then Katrina's step brother, yeah that's right, Dan's son, the husband of Lacey. Yeah ain't that some Greg and Marsha Brady bullshit! I know they aren't blood related but damn! I mean if my step brother was hot I have no doubt I would fuck him, but at least we wouldn't have to worry about creating a fetus from our love tryst! So to my family that doesn't know I am gay, let's rethink things before you start judging me and my "lifestyle choice."
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